Meat, potatoes, and fighting for my life

When I veer off the fructose-free path, I usually wind up eating a lot of “meat & potatoes” dishes, for a few days. Not always literally potatoes but it may be white rice, quinoa, or Annie’s Gluten-Free Mac & Cheese. I try to have some spinach salad, too, with my homemade salad dressing, or a small serving of broccoli.

I used to HATE celery but lately, I’ve been enjoying celery with Sunbutter, which I find more delicious than peanut butter. I don’t know if peanuts are a problem for me but I decided not to take the chance and found Sunbutter at King Soopers (Kroger’s/City Market). It’s made from sunflower seeds!

My calorie intake is a lot lower, eating fructose-free, and I’ve lost 16 pounds since Thanksgiving. That’s not the fastest weight loss but hey, it’s going in the right direction. Now that I have Diabetes to worry about, my calorie intake is even more restrictive. My jeans are baggy and I expect to see more weight disappearing as I check the scale, each week.

The hardest part for me is resisting those “just a taste” moments. When my family is eating something poisonous for me, sometimes I must have just a taste. We have Girl Scout cookies in the cabinet. I tend to eat just one cookie, if I’m looking for a snack. Sometimes, those moments turn into some bad decisions, leaving me feeling very sick.

Since I’ve struggled with food issues my entire life, this is nothing new. There was a time when one cookie turned into my eating the entire package and burying the evidence deep in the trash can. Binge eating was a problem. Sneak eating was a problem (eating in the car was the biggest issue). If no one else saw me eat it, then I guess it didn’t count, right? I didn’t get to a size 22 by eating salads. I believe the fructose issue helped me get here, though. Now, I’m in a position where a don’t have a choice. I have to eat carefully and I am losing weight, though I’m not even doing that on purpose.

Fructose may not kill me but it does make me very, very sick. Diabetes will kill me. I’m fighting a battle that I have to win.